January 3rd, 2015

So Middle Bro's birthday was on the 4th, which means we had family dinner on the 3rd (it was a Saturday). It's been tradition that Middle Bro gets his daughter for his bday, father's day, some family functions, and he shares the bigger holidays with Krazy. Apparently Krazy was experiencing some pregnancy mood swings that day because she spent the day telling MIL that our niece can/can not go to the dinner. When I heard about it I let my pain killers get the best of me and got lil fired up. I was all for going to Krazy's  door and telling her that the child WILL BE going to dinner whether she likes it or not. MIL was a little nicer but not by much. She was actually fired up as well! (Totally out of norm for her) she wasn't arguing with Krazy but she was stewing. 

After a bunch of threatening texts from Krazy, telling MIL that she has sole responsibility for the child and it's all on her, etc etc, MIL got the text: "she's going." So they hopped in the car and picked up their granddaughter before Krazy threw a fit again. 

I don't get it. You don't have to like the other parent but you let the kid go to her dad's bday dinner. It turned out to be a good time, too. 

I'm ready for Krazy to have this baby. She'll be so much more relaxed with our niece. However, our niece's  jealousy will probably spark back up. Ugh. 

Black Holidays

I might as well get this out and off my chest.

New Year's Eve, my poor husband caught my mother at another man's house. Inside his locked gate actually. After texting his long-term girlfriend, making sure she wasn't home. We knew for months that she was up to no good when she won't allow anyone on her phone. And my dad kept seeing the guy's number come up on phone records. We knew it was coming. Except, she denies everything.

My aunt called 911 on my dad, thinking he was suicidal (I know what was said, how it can be perceived that way from a stranger, but no way is my dad suicidal). My mother then put a restraining order against my dad. She took away the last thing he cared the most about, my brother and sister. At least til this Friday.

According to my dad, my mom filed for divorce yesterday. Shocker.

I wish they could've been adults throughout this whole thing. But no, she has to play games, setting my dad up to fail. Oh, she was making the boat payments in full on time, but the house payment was 3months behind. Because my dad's name was on it. SUCH a courteous one, my mother.

I pray everyday that my brother and sister don't get messed up because of this. My brother is such a roller coaster anyways. And my sister is very much a daddy's girl. It hurt when I had to tell my sister, no I couldn't eat spaghetti and spend the night. Regardless it was already 8:30pm.

During same week this shit went down, I developed a double ear infection. FUN. I have hydros to help with the pain but I can't take them during the day. And I want to sleep when I come off them. But at least my ears aren't in such pain and I can close my jaw again. I do wish I can hear again, though.

Krazy and her boyfriend broke up. And she's trying to be besties with MIL again. Ain't happenin. Krazy's pouting because we're not giving her the time of day. Good. She needs to be told no.

I think that's it for now. Gawd I hope so. I don't want to deal with more of this shit.

Don't Judge

This past month hasn't been very nice.

I've been ignoring twitter. On purpose. I know, shocker. It was fun to keep up with Twitter friends and just hear their drama, because you weren't involved. Now, I don't want to hear another whine, especially from strangers. I'll listen to my friends, and help them whenever I can. But honestly, I got enough shit going on, I just don't want it.

I'm heavily debating blocking a family member on Facebook. Which is weird because FB is a place I let my family follow me. (Twitter is totally diff story). I don't want to see posts, updates, lies, or falsely happy pictures from this person. I don't want them to see any of my pics, honest updates, or see any glimpse of our happy lives. I feel cold hearted but at the same time, I've lost all respect for this person. I think we've spoken 2x since this whole thing started, (a month ago). I want to say what's happened, and what's occupying my head. I just can't. But what I will say is, when I was first approached, I was happy for the upcoming growth of a person. But the outcome and events that have since happened, just fucking sucks.

Ok. I need to move on from that.

Um. oh! oh! oh!

Krazy made an appearance at Thanksgiving dinner!! She had to pick up our niece, but decided she couldn't wait in the car like it was arranged. The best part, with the exception of one person, everyone was awkwardly silent. and it was glorious. Krazy's been telling our niece lies, truths that shouldn't ever include a child, and stories to relay to MIL. Just sickening the way she uses her child. But I was glad she didn't get the warm welcome she was expecting. 

The other day I realized that we seem pretty redneckish. So. Middle Bro is dating my aunt. And I'm working super closely with ExRoomie's GF. And my other aunt posted a pic of me and Husband with all my siblings/cousins (all close in age, except LilA), and they looked like they were our own kids. Oh lordy lou. I hope work doesn't ask for the family explaination. If I don't like it, I don't have to explain, right? Gawd, I hope not. 

Let's see, Krazy, family drama, redneck, yeah. I think that's about it. If not, oh well. It's just gonna hafta be. 

PS- Krazy heard Middle Bro was dating the aunt she about attacked at my wedding. She's not happy. All of a sudden she's trying to talk to the family more. How fucking convienent.

July 21st

July 21st was National Tequila Day, and the popular Taco Tuesday.

Monday had been a hard day for Husband, so Tuesday was supposed to be better. GF and her son were over helping with something when Husband asked GF if ExRoomie had talked to her yet. She said no, but she knew there was something he had to say. So, Husband decided to kill 2 birds with one stone and tell us both. Krazy had gone up to MIL and informed her that she was pregnant.

{collective gasp please}

Gawd, just thinking back to that part makes my blood run hot. Krazy had been on the outs of the family for a week. And this?

But here's the problem. I understand it's possible, but there are some issues with her timeline. As of the 21st:

• 3wks prior was Krazy's last stomach doc appt (guess she'd been having issues for months), and they test for pregnancy, which was a negative.
• 2wks prior to the 21st, Krazy was on her period. GF knew that because in a bachelor pad, it's pretty easy to tell who's on their period when it's not you.
• shouldn't she just now be ovulating?

Disregard the part that she's been drinking a lot, very frequently.

Again, I know some women get their periods and can be pregnant. And that some have tested uber early and still came out positive. But considering her past month, there's enough doubt.

MIL's voiced that she has a gut feeling that it's just a hoax to get Middle Bro trapped. On her side of the family, if you have a gut feeling, then you're 99% correct. I told Husband about MIL's feeling and he gave me this odd look. He told me that she's never been wrong with those feelings.

Considering the situation, I hope the pregnancy is a lie. But if it's true, then she better hope to God it's Middle Bro's.

The Telephone Game

*Disclaimer: I started this 3months ago and I apologize for the lack of luster. The next post makes it better, I promise!*

I mentioned on my last post that one of my friends called me with new information on Krazy. There was. OH BOY was there new information! Thankfully it was nice outside so I was able to sit outside for the call because there was no way I would be able to absorb this stuff, just sitting on the couch.
Phone rings, I answer. No preamble, we just got right down to business. Coworker of my friend approached Friend and talked a little with her about Krazy and whatever tie there was there (sorry, it was more than 2hrs ago, I can't remember). Friend tried to inform Coworker that Krazy is one of those people where you say little, nothing offensive, and take a step back. Coworker may not have believed Friend when she was told, Krazy will do what she needs to, to stalk this family. See, from the beginning, Krazy was adamant, she was going to marry into this household family. Don't ask why, I don't understand it.

Anyways, there was a nasty little rumor that Krazy was seeing 2 guys at the same time. And then the rumor she was engaged. I laughed at that one. Even she wouldn't get engaged after such short time. And don't forget the ever-so-mandatory rumor (damn small towns!) that she was uh, trying out a few guys' beds.

None of that mattered though because, as it turned out, Krazy and Middle Bro were having dinner together as we were speaking.

Sadly, it must of been a boring dinner because nothing came of it.

Phew!

Long Story for a Long Family Trip

Jumping a few months ahead, we reach the summer. Last summer was abnormally chilly (80s, not 90s or 100s), but we were in our only heat wave and it was finally hot. The InLaws invited all the kids and significant others to the place they were staying at, at Lake Chelan. Roomie and Bossy were in Montana for some softball tourney. So Krazy, Bonehead, and their daughter drove up to our house, and we all loaded up in our truck (guys, I love our truck. The back seats recline a little!) with the boat in tow, and we drove up to Chelan.

The condo was a little cramped with 6 adults and a 2yo. We settled in for the first day and everyone  was getting a routine down. We were all pumped to go out on our small boat the next day. The weather was supposed to be hot with hint of a breeze.

The next morning lunches were made, hair was pulled back, everyone had swim suits on. Krazy was going for the neon 90s look and was doing that stupid self portrait every girl seems to do on Facebook.

To MIL and I, it appeared that Krazy was pumping herself up to go boating. She's never been on our boat. Her daughter scares VERY easily. Just put a sleeping dog next to her and watch the reaction. You'll agree if you've seen it. Anyways, Krazy is same way. She'll pretend she's excited to try something new but we all know it'll be hell. We weren't even going to do anything fun anyways. There were too many people (3 with very bad backs, let alone the toddler), so all we were going to do was putt around and do very easy tubing.

We make the long trek down to dock and wait our turn to unload (it was our first boat launch with only ONE ramp). It was still early-mid morning and we were all sweating. It was going to be a hot one and that warm, clear lake water was going to feel good!

This water is crystal clear. That was probably about 40-50feet deep. Freaking beautiful!

We go out to a clear, calm spot to float (about 10-15mins out) and Krazy starts complaining. She's hot. She doesn't feel good. I mentally tell her that she shouldn't have sprayed the entire tanning oil bottle on her before we got out here. Everyone tells her she's probably dehydrated and too much sun (really?!). Krazy refused to drink water. Refused to dip her feet in the water to cool down. Fiance asked if she wants to go back to the dock and go back to the room. She said yes, but didn't want everyone else to be dragged down with her. Fiance very loud and clear when he assured her, no the group wasn't going in. Just her and our niece. :)

Ya know, it was amazing how much more fun we had once she went in. Everyone stayed hydrated and got in the water when they needed a quick cool down. We kept our heads covered. We tubed. The boat took on some more water than normal BUT we had way more weight in her than normal. But she ran wonderful!! FIL and Bonehead were incredibly sore after tubing (bad backs) but you can tell they had a blast.

We all went out for dinner that night. It was a fancy place and if we lived closer, I would've loved to get married there. I simply cannot explain how beautiful it was. Everyone was on their best behavior. Except Krazy got a little too loopy and didn't try very hard to keep the mouth filter on. I can't remember exactly what was said but there were a few times MIL and I exchanged concerned looks.

After that day, Krazy was quiet. She slept most of the way home. She didn't say anything really brow-raising. But she never seems to stay that way.

Bummer.

It's Baby Season!!

The rush to get the nursery done, baby showers, the "oh crap, what are we in for?", and the excited announcing. All part of Baby Season. It's not a time of year. It's a few years of your life. It comes at different times for everyone but it normally happens in your twenty-somethings. And if you're not pregnant, a friend of yours is, and you get a nose dive lesson into being supportive.

February was an exciting month (ok, more like week) because we had 2 couple-friends give birth to healthy babies. One week it was twins, and the next week it was our close friends new son. (so excited for them all!) I have a feeling that we will be bringing diapers as gifts instead of beer. As long as we get our baby fix, it's totally ok with us (at least for me!).

I told you February was an exciting time, but it was also a very emotional/insightful time. So along with all the wedding stresses, Fiance was about to come off Winter Shift (nights) and merge back into days, and we were sort of pushed into having potential life changing talks. Nothing bad, just about how insane it is that our friends are getting married, having kids, raising families, starting their lives. We may not make the greatest  of incomes but if the stork decided to drop a present at our house, then we think we could shuffle a few things and provide the best life we could manage. Between being alone 3/4 of the week, and Roomie's new girlfriend bringing up last years memories, I found myself thinking more about Krazy.

It was last year at the InLaws house. The men in the living room watching some sport, of course. The women were in the kitchen and the tv room that's adjacent to the kitchen. MIL and I were at the far edge of the kitchen. Roomie's girlfriend at the time (I think Bossy is an appropriate name), and Krazy were in the tv room. Krazy had a glazed look over eyes as she watched her daughter and Bossy's daughter play together. Krazy told Bossy that she and Bonehead were going to start trying for a boy here very soon (her timeline conflicted with her wedding, btw. Keep that in mind with this Catholic family) and asked Bossy when she and Roomie will start trying. Bossy looked at Krazy like she had grown a second head. Bossy informed Krazy in a not so subtle tone, that theres no way she and Roomie could afford a second child (2nd for her, at least) and they weren't anywhere near that point in the relationship.

I believe MIL & I were trying our damndest not to bust up laughing.

I wish I remembered the words Bossy and Krazy exchanged, but essentially Bossy got Krazy to STFU. I think then Krazy knew a few things on where she stands:

• She's too bat shit crazy to care for a second child
• She doesn't need a second child when they struggle that much for their only one
• Our family doesn't want a second grandchild...that way.
• A baby doesn't solve relationship problems.

I still get a big smile when I think back to that. I wasn't close to Bossy but I believe we celebrated that day with a beer later that night (way after her daughter had gone to bed). It was a glorious victory in this never ending war with Krazy. It kinda reminds me of another story about Krazy...

I Died...Then I Came Back

I knew I was totally slacking on my blog, but didn't know it was to the point I had to reread my prior posts! Yikes! I'm sorry I haven't posted anything. I've been thinking about it, I truly have! I'm at a standstill, a brick wall perhaps. I have a story I really want to post but its so far towards The End, I don't really feel like I should tell it so soon. But right now, I have things I feel I need to address. Mainly because I'm tired of my brain reminding me to post it while I'm in the shower. (Seriously, what is it about the shower that makes my mind think of shiz like I'm on crack?!) (I've never done crack).


First off, for those who follow me on Twitter, I've been posting a very vague hashtag #somethingupmysleeve. I can't tell you what it's about yet. But if everything goes as planned, then I should be posting the reveal next Wednesday. A week from today. I know that was such a tease. Trust me, it'll so be worth it. I want to tell you guys! I truly do! But considering the topic, my head, and my feelings on this topic, I need to wait. If you happen to be one of the five people who know, I ask you to please let me do this by myself.


Secondly, a partial reason why I've been MIA (not the singer), is because of the wedding planning. For a few glorious minutes, it looked like this weekend was going to be my first weekend of absolutely nothing planned. Now I'm just hoping plans don't take all day so I can come back home.


Thirdly, shit. I forgot what the third one was. [10mins later, still thinking on what it was] Moving on.


Finally, I want to leave on a Krazy note. Tonight I was at the mall, doing some wedding shopping. I was in Victoria's Secret looking at all the fun swim suits! It's a terrifying sight to see me in one, but the colors are just too fun! I was holding a bikini top I thought MIL would like (oh! They get back from vacay this week!!) and remembered a Krazy story. Fiance and I were at the InLaws house for gawd-knows what. Let's see... I was still skinny so about 1-2.5yrs ago. That sound good? Good. Well, when we got there MIL was pissed and let me tell you, it's rare I see her like that. Turned out that Krazy and Bonehead asked MIL to watch their baby while they went and partied at the river. By now, it was already a pattern that InLaws watched our Niece while Bonehead & Krazy played. I guess Krazy didn't have enough swimsuits (you'd be laughing now if you knew better) because she grabbed all of MIL's bikinis, cover ups, and matching sandals. MIL had planned on going swimming at her Dad's house that afternoon. For some unknown reason, she didn't feel comfortable swimming with her Dad and a baby in a skimpy swimsuit. Remember, MIL would let us borrow anything if we had asked. If Krazy asked beforehand, MIL would've loaned her cover ups and sandals. But MIL doesn't like sharing swimsuits. I don't blame her. I think MIL got new suits after that. I'll have to check with Fiance, but I also think that was the reason I got a very nice gift in front of Krazy, when Krazy didn't get one. I'll post about that one when I can ask Fiance.

Hope this satisfies everyone for awhile. I'm trying so hard to remember stories of Krazy that are longer than "yeah, she said something stupid and we all stared at her."

*Jaw Drop*

Today I'm skipping ahead 2years because I had told a friend about it this weekend.

It was New Years Eve, 2010. It was the first NYE party we held at our house. We're not strangers to having parties or drinking. We're used to that. Fiance, Roomie, and myself had all been cleaning for 2days. But we didn't Krazy proof it. I had no clue that I had to.

I don't remember what all we were doing to the house but apparently de-bachelorizing was high on my priority. I don't knwo, I don't try to figure Me out. It's confusing in this cluttered head. But apparently Roomie's round table and chairs took up too much room. I had been wanting my table in the house for a long time, I just needed to find chairs. My table is an antique, old skool square table that my funky G~ma bought and refinished for me. My table has 2 leafs, but you have to lift the top entire off to pull the leafs out. I freaking LOVE my table. Fiance found some chairs that are slightly darker than the table (my fault though, oops!) and we brought them home. It was in the house for about 2months before this party. I kept placemats on the table because liquids leave a stain in the finish. People knew I loved my table.

So back to the party. It's well under way, but nowhere near midnight (meaning people were still fairly sober). Bonehead and Krazy came over before having to go to next party. That's fine by me since there's so many people over. I was fiddle-fartin around the kitchen and Krazy was at the table with few people. I couldn't get a pickle jar open so I was going to the living room where some guys were. If they couldn't open it, then we just wouldn't have pickles. Krazy said she could open it. I looked at her questionably because she's got about the same arm strength as me. Not that much. I handed her the jar in case she knew something I hadn't just tried. She took the jar and started smacking the top on my table. I was shocked. Eyes wide, mouth open, frozen. After the 2nd or 3rd try I took the jar and told her the guys will open it. Not sure when but shortly after, she asked if I was upset. I told her she had just left dents in my antique table. She apologized but this girl hasn't ever said a sincere apology in our house, ever. I tried to remain calm while I quickly finished in the kitchen. Then I went outside to Fiance to vent off some anger before I got really upset.

I've seen this "technique" done before. My family has done it at one point or another. But we've done it on surfaces that are known to withstand it, and we don't hit that hard. Typically, wood just isn't a great surface to hit stuff. And not at someone else's house without permission. The table is now always covered by placemats and various items now. We put a beeswax coat on it so the dents are protected, but I still know. My poor table.

Everlasting...love?

Today, one of my fabulous friends (who thinks this blog is pretty freakin awesome), sent me a text about Krazy. She said that Krazy had made a Facebook post "about acting single or whatever...Not so in love?" I immediately responded, "screen shot that shiz!" And viola I got one. However, I'm not so good with editing that type of stuff so you're going to have to trust me.

Krazy: "I can smile, live it up, The way a single girl does." Hmm. Interesting. For those who don't know, those are the lyrics to a song by Rascal Flatts ft. Natasha Bedingfield. The song is about two people broken up and faking the smiles, putting up the front of being happy, and how hard it is to fake being happy. Now do you see why its so interesting?! Monday (or was it Tuesday?) Krazy sent Roomie a "6pg text" about how she loves Bonehead, and Bonehead loves her to death. Yadda yadda yadda, gag me. Love in this family ain't no temporary thang. It's deep, it's meaningful, and it's a way of life. Love doesn't end in time for the weekend. Part of me is hoping Bonehead just took advantage of the situation and "toot it boot it" because really, who wants Krazy drama again?

While we're on topic, what's is with this girl? Doesn't Bonehead realize there are other vaginas in this world?! Ya know, ones that act all hoity toity. He's putting the pussy on the pedestal. And that shiz ain't cool when it likes to roll off the damn pedestal.

Hopefully Sunday was a temporary thing. Maybe its like Inception and this whole thing is a dream. I don't know. What I do know is, I'll find out on Sunday. Ha. A week later. I have a feeling Monday's post will be pretty freakin entertaining.

Rewinding, A History of WTFs

I left things a little vague yesterday. So I decided to clue you guys in a little. Let me break it all down for you.

 Characters:
Me- I'm telling you the dang stories!
Fiance- Self explanatory, doncha think? Also, youngest of 3 brothers.
Roomie- The oldest of the 3 brothers. He lives with us.
Krazy- Our subject of this blog.
Bonehead- The middle brother, the "genius" who decided to get back with baby momma.
MIL- Future Mother in Law.
FIL- Future Father in Law.

I have lots of stories about Krazy and the things I've seen. Since InLaws are pre-wedding vacationing for 3wks, I figured I'd tell ya'll some of my stories. After all, the newest drama won't start til InLaws get back. Because of my oh-so-marvelous timeframe remembering skills, I won't go in exact order of stories. But the very beginning should definitely be first.

When I met Krazy, she and Bonehead were staying at his Rents' house because they had just had a baby 3 months prior. I wasn't a drinker at that time but learned even my weak ass drinks were too strong for her. Not sure if she's ever had a strong drink. It's a shame, really. Over the next 2 months I learned a few of her mannerisms. I noticed she treated our Future MIL like shit, still wanted to go out and party even though her 4month old didn't, and she had this thought in her head that we all owed her.

Let me tell you something about our FMIL. She's pretty freaking awesome! When I'm at their house, I'm instantly calm and overwhelmed with a sense of welcome. She accepted me as a daughter right from the very beginning. Fiance let me in on a little secret. I've done the dishes everytime we go over there for dinner. BBQs and parties are no exception. There was ONE time I didn't do them, and that was because I fell asleep on the couch. In the entire time Krazy has lived (rent free) under their roof, she never has done that. Ever. And she wasn't even employed.

I learned something else about Krazy in those few months. She was competitive.

She was smug about how she could talk basketball with the brothers and FIL. But she was threatened that she had to share MIL. MIL laughed and smiled when we talked. With Krazy and MIL, conversation was forced. Eventually Krazy tried to "help" me do dishes once. She was so proud of herself, someone (not in household) saw that moment of us both doing dishes. She smiled, I rolled my eyes and raised an eyebrow.
She took MILs clothes, and that was a constant battle. MIL would gladly offer up any piece of clothing she had for either of us, as long as we asked first. That was known as the Period of Lost Clothes.

Remember how Krazy can't handle "strong" drinks? Well, I dunno what bug crawled in her head but the need to go out and party was insane. InLaws had the baby what felt like every weekend. Even to this day, the child was partially (like almost 75%) raised by MIL. It was always someone's birthday that Krazy and Bonehead had to go and celebrate. Yet, Krazy would try to tell me how she doesn't have a social life now that she has a baby. How's that work?

Alright. That's it for today. I don't feel like getting myself all worked up over her. Perhaps tomorrow.