August 12, 2012

It took a month to type this one out. She's just that exhausting. Her behavior was just so out of the blue and completely uncalled for.

August 11th-12th was MiddleBro's weekend to have his daughter. When the weekend was over, he was to do "the swap" at his parents' house in Ptown. Apparently he was 5minutes late and Krazy lost her shit. She went off on MIL. She called her a horrible person. She went off about how our niece would be appalled at how our family treats Krazy. How Krazy doesn't want our niece to have anything to do with us, and is never allowed to be there again. She then rubbed her belly and told MIL she won't ever get to know that child. MIL never retalliated, she just kept asking what was wrong, what brought this on. Oh wait, the only hint of retaliation MIL had was when she asked Krazy if she was even pregnant. MiddleBro stood there, completely frozen in shock at what was going on in front of him. Our niece was in Krazy's car, watching all of this go down. FIL came out, got right there to Krazy, and told her, do not disrespect my wife, get the fuck off my property, you are never allowed back. And Krazy left. 

Now, let's disect her little rant. Typically, 5 minutes is nothing to get that upset over. Be irritated, that's ok. But not a reason to flip the fuck out. Next, MIL is quite the opposite of a horrible person. She damn near raised our niece as much as MiddleBro and Krazy have. She has provided food, shelter, clothes, toys, movies, & life lessons to that child that Krazy and MiddleBro hadn't. She watches that child whenever a babysitter was needed, regardless of how tired she was. So to go off on MIL and call her a horrible person, is entirely out of bounds. How about the part when Krazy claims we treat her like shit. Hmm. My husband remembers very vividly during our Rehearsal Dinner, the night before our wedding, how Krazy asked him what she can do to be on good terms with him and get our "approval". He told her that the only thing she needs to do is to treat MIL respectfully. You respect MIL, you're good with Husband. She never asked my opinion. I didn't like her, but I was being civil and polite. And quite frankly, I'm glad MIL voiced her opinion about Krazy's pregnancy.

It's now time for MiddleBro and the whole family to start thinking heavily about court. He's never gone to court for his daughter for custody. They still do every other weekend is his "time" but it still needs to be court-recognized. Unfortunately, the State of Washington makes it incredibly hard (damn near impossible) for a child to be removed from the mother. My friend told me of her cousin: he tried for custody because Baby-Mama was an alcoholic. Judge refused it, and told him he needs more proof. Isn't that assinine? An alcoholic mother can still have full custody of her child, even though the father is the better choice? That is what we'll have to deal with. I refuse to say it's on MiddleBro. We all band together for family and we all will do what we can to maintain the few visits we get, just to see that little girl.

If I remember correctly, it was either Tuesday or Wednesday that Krazy told MiddleBro that she lost the baby due to stress. The stress she caused herself. I doubted she was ever pregnant, but if she was, thank God that baby won't be born into this mess.

We do get to see our niece, thankfully. Interestingly, I last saw her at MIL's house. :) Unfortunately, she's resorted to talking baby-whiney-talk. She's also told MIL a few things that make you wonder what in the hell Krazy is telling her daughter. I wish I could remember the exact words, but it was along the lines of us hating Krazy and her (among a few others). It crushed MIL. You don't involve your 3yo on your adult matters.

You don't act like a child yourself when you become a parent. You grow up and are responsible for another human being. A perfect, innocent, child.

July 23rd

Krazy announced her pregnancy on Facebook the day after she told MIL. (By the way, what happened to the superstition about not announcing til after the 1st trimester?) ExRoomie posted a day or two later something along the lines of "Yeah..and we're supposed to be happy? lmao...kicks rocks" and Krazy did not like that. She really didn't like my "that seems to be the general consensus" (again, along the lines...) comment either. In fact, she disliked us so much, she didn't contact me or ExRoomie. She went to MIL. (MIL had written a comment agreeing but then deleted it. Heck, whole post is deleted, sadly.)

I texted MIL later, asking if Krazy had texted her (remember, Krazy goes to MIL, not us) and she sent me the whole exchange. Would ya like to read it? Of course you do! So here it goes, 3 texts from Krazy, to MIL, forwarded to me.

Krazy: "This is bullcrap with what I have to put up with. Seriously! I have ur son. [ExRoomie] talking crap on fb and daughter inlaw [me]. If he aint happy and all of u he doesn't need to post that crap. This child in me is his nephew or niece and ur grandchild. That aint cool at all. I'm done I have nothing else to say to this family. Please don't text me or call me. I will text u about [niece] If I need to. Thanks" *All spelling, punctuation, and grammer is Krazy's. Not mine.*

MIL's convinced Krazy just loves the drama, and that the pregnancy is her way of trapping MiddleBro. She voiced a few other complaints too, but they pretty much just copied mine and I don't believe I've ever hidden my opinion. :)  I like how she said she has "nothing else to say to this family." If she holds true to it, then it'll finally be quiet for MIL's phone.


A week after the pregnancy announcement, ExRoomie finally heard from MiddleBro (who hadn't stayed in his own apartment for that week), when he got the text that MiddleBro is moving out in few months. Yesterday, (August 5th) is first time I've seen MiddleBro. He's been keeping to himself. But you can see the strain on his face. You'd see stress on my face too if my baby-momma isn't letting me see or talk to my child. Not sure when that started but Krazy is refusing to let our niece see or talk to MiddleBro. That is the most assinine thing I've ever heard in my entire life! I was told MiddleBro is going to take her to court but who knows. Not going to believe it until I see it.

This girl just needs help. Bad. She may be making life harder for everyone around them, but she doesn't see how this will fuck up her daughter?

This blog was supposed to track the frequency of Krazy's outburts and tantrums. Now it's just recording everything she does and says. It's like her own electronic medical file. Or would it be mental? I know MiddleBro can withstand Krazy and her antics. But you don't take a child away from his/her parent as a way of punishment.

July 21st

July 21st was National Tequila Day, and the popular Taco Tuesday.

Monday had been a hard day for Husband, so Tuesday was supposed to be better. GF and her son were over helping with something when Husband asked GF if ExRoomie had talked to her yet. She said no, but she knew there was something he had to say. So, Husband decided to kill 2 birds with one stone and tell us both. Krazy had gone up to MIL and informed her that she was pregnant.

{collective gasp please}

Gawd, just thinking back to that part makes my blood run hot. Krazy had been on the outs of the family for a week. And this?

But here's the problem. I understand it's possible, but there are some issues with her timeline. As of the 21st:

• 3wks prior was Krazy's last stomach doc appt (guess she'd been having issues for months), and they test for pregnancy, which was a negative.
• 2wks prior to the 21st, Krazy was on her period. GF knew that because in a bachelor pad, it's pretty easy to tell who's on their period when it's not you.
• shouldn't she just now be ovulating?

Disregard the part that she's been drinking a lot, very frequently.

Again, I know some women get their periods and can be pregnant. And that some have tested uber early and still came out positive. But considering her past month, there's enough doubt.

MIL's voiced that she has a gut feeling that it's just a hoax to get Middle Bro trapped. On her side of the family, if you have a gut feeling, then you're 99% correct. I told Husband about MIL's feeling and he gave me this odd look. He told me that she's never been wrong with those feelings.

Considering the situation, I hope the pregnancy is a lie. But if it's true, then she better hope to God it's Middle Bro's.

July 14th

July 14th (Monday) was scheduled if we had bothered looking at a calendar.


In hindsight, MIL knew Krazy's behavior from Saturday night was the big clue. But considering Sunday was quiet, MIL wasn't expecting to get bombarded by angry Krazy texts. Poor MIL got the brunt of Krazy's Quarterly Tantrum again.


Krazy claims that she's sick of the crap she has to deal with in this family, how we'll never accept her, they favor me, how FIL is racist, etc etc. She also told MIL that she was tired of being attacked by the family. She used "attacked" in her essay text. Seriously. Husband was on the phone with MIL on speaker phone when I heard that so I wrote on a napkin "perhaps she should come to our house so she can honestly say she was attacked". Something along those lines and not nice at all. To say she was attacked, is a slap to the face to the InLaws after all they've done for Krazy and Middle Bro. Krazy lived in their house, free of any costs, for a very long time, disrespectful towards MIL, and acted like they owed her something. To top it all off, everyone had been trying to give her the second chance she wanted. No one said anything offensive about/to her that weekend.


Now here's the part that needs to be addressed. FIL is not racist. If he was, would he really do so much for Krazy? Krazy is Mexican. FIL is loud and will say something and stick to it, just to get a rise out of you. I've NEVER been offended by him. I used to/still get comments from him about what's on my foot (tattoo) or what was in my nose (piercing). He always smiles and gives you a hug afterwards. FIL's thing for Krazy is to call her a Spaniard. She's always replied with, "I'm not a Spaniard. I'm a Mexican" and laughs it off. He'd been saying that since before I came around 3.5yrs ago! We're not sure why she decided to be offended now.

She claimed InLaws favor me over her. Even GF told her she was cray for thinking they play favorites. Krazy was upset about how they had offered me dinner when I walked in but they didn't say anything to her. Uh, I guess we're playing preschool now. She had already been at the house for awhile before I got there, and she sees InLaws regularly because of our Niece.

The Tantrum was fairly typical, only a few new things to complain about. The heartbreaking part was when MIL told Krazy she's done playing her games and Krazy pulled the "oh, you don't love [niece] anymore...?" card. MIL bends over backwards for that little girl and loves her more than anything. I don't understand how Krazy can get off pulling that card. Is she really that sick that she feels this need to hold some type of power over someone? Why? Why use an innocent child as pawn? Does she not see how that this behavior is already affecting our niece? I just don't get it.

It's reached a point where it's no longer infuriating, it's just concerning. Krazy needs help but I can bet that she either won't go, or won't follow directions correctly.

{sigh}

Chronological Chain of Events

I think the best way to explain what happened during this time frame is to just list it out.

July 12th (Thursday)- Ladies Night at Joker's Bar. Krazy made it well known she was going out with her roomie and sister. *Note: we find out this next bit, the next day* Krazy calls GF for a ride...at 1-2am, when she is fully aware GF has her son with her. GF loads up her was-sleeping 6yo. Goes to bar. Krazy's sister and roomie tell GF they been looking for Krazy for past 2 hrs and couldn't find her. Krazy's sister is livid at Krazy for not being responsible when she knew she still had a 30min drive home. There was big ol' argument between gf, Krazy's sister, Krazy's roomie, Krazy, and some random group of guys about what will happen. Krazy and her Roomie get a ride from the not-so-random-like-she-said guys, and GF goes back home.

July 13th (Friday)- ExRoomie wakes up to 1am phone call from GF so he calls and gets a recap of the midnight escapades. He was upset as it was, but became furious at Krazy when GF informed ExRoomie, that Krazy told GF not to tell ExRoomie or MiddleBro. GF's like, uh no that ain't happenin (I paraphrased there, but I'm sure I'm not too far off). ExRoomie tells Husband and GF tells bits and pieces to me. Husband and I were informing MIL on speaker phone when Middle Bro walks in the house being loud (thank goodness!). We immediately end the convo. Our double date with ExRoomie and GF became a Brothers-and-girls-and-niece dinner. Oh joy. All the guys were drinking, GF being good driver only had 1 drink and that was early. I had ordered a 2nd drink but it arrived towards the end of the meal. Krazy did same. Then it comes down to leave and as we were getting in our car, Krazy is getting in passenger of her car. She was making Middle Bro drive. NOT COOL. Husband said a few words.

The funny part about that was, I've seen that girl a week before, drink 2 bottles of wine and barely look buzzed. Why would 2 drinks effect her worse than all the drinks Middle Bro was drinking?

July 14th- I was down in Ptown for my sissy's 3rd birthday and my friend's bridal shower. Krazy tried to volunteer me to take my niece down to my sister's party. I love her to death, but that's between BOTH parents, NOT me. And not when I already had plans. Middle Bro had already planned on taking her with him when the whole family went boating. They had a blast!

At the end of boating, I met up with them at the Cousins' new house. Krazy and rest of family were already fed and chilling outside. I thought it was a good time. Krazy played with the Cousins' older kid while their youngest played with our niece. Everyone was talking with each other and laughing.

That's why Monday, July 16th, was way out of left field.

Pretty Please with Sugar on Top

I'm done with the wedding! I have TIME!! I've forgotten what this is like. I could get used to this.

(Scratch out the whole 'time' comment. The 1st weekend in July is the only weekend we had to ourselves until September)

So in comes May. Cousin's wedding is coming up. Our niece is a flower girl in it. Krazy was coming up with the fam. Glad we stayed in the hotel across the street. I guess Krazy was trying to work herself back in the family, and be on everyone's good graces. She behaved herself (besides her and Middle Bro leaving our niece with the InLaws during the reception).

She apparently told MIL that she wanted to help with our wedding. I really doubted it and didn't like it but was it really such a big deal in the whole picture? No. So Krazy helped with the Rehearsal Dinner. She brought in 3 different types of drool-worthy cheesecake cupcakes. (Major points to Krazy). And made this little sign for us. I have to admit, she's being true to her word and is actually trying to make peace with this family. She had talked with ExRoomies current GF (she's a keeper! Perhaps I'll name her GoodGF?), and was asking advice on how to not be on everyone's shit list. GF told her that if she wanted to make good with us, she needed to talk to us seperately and sort it out, but before the wedding. Krazy took her advice, but decided rehearsal night was when she needed to talk to Husband (that flows so much nicer than fiance). All Husband told her was to be good and respect his mom, and she'll be ok. Note: to this day, she still has not talked to just me.

She kept it up for awhile, this good change she's done. Me, my niece, and Krazy went to Old Navy's dollar flip flop sale and didn't say one bad thing to each other. On the Fourth of July she got under ExRoomies skin, but I'm just going to push that under the rug because alchoholic beverages were involved.

July 14th was the "calm" (fi you can call it that) before the storm.

Again.

The Telephone Game

*Disclaimer: I started this 3months ago and I apologize for the lack of luster. The next post makes it better, I promise!*

I mentioned on my last post that one of my friends called me with new information on Krazy. There was. OH BOY was there new information! Thankfully it was nice outside so I was able to sit outside for the call because there was no way I would be able to absorb this stuff, just sitting on the couch.
Phone rings, I answer. No preamble, we just got right down to business. Coworker of my friend approached Friend and talked a little with her about Krazy and whatever tie there was there (sorry, it was more than 2hrs ago, I can't remember). Friend tried to inform Coworker that Krazy is one of those people where you say little, nothing offensive, and take a step back. Coworker may not have believed Friend when she was told, Krazy will do what she needs to, to stalk this family. See, from the beginning, Krazy was adamant, she was going to marry into this household family. Don't ask why, I don't understand it.

Anyways, there was a nasty little rumor that Krazy was seeing 2 guys at the same time. And then the rumor she was engaged. I laughed at that one. Even she wouldn't get engaged after such short time. And don't forget the ever-so-mandatory rumor (damn small towns!) that she was uh, trying out a few guys' beds.

None of that mattered though because, as it turned out, Krazy and Middle Bro were having dinner together as we were speaking.

Sadly, it must of been a boring dinner because nothing came of it.

Phew!